Moving in with someone

[marksmith]

Hi peeps,

This seems like as good a place as any to get some opinions...

Person A and person B are in a relationship and are considering moving in together. Person A owns (outright, no mortgage) a house. Person B would be moving into that house. Person B currenty has a rented flat. Both people in good, regular, steady jobs, with savings etc.

What would it be reasonable for Person B to contribute, and why? For example:

* Nothing. (Person A is already paying gas, electricity etc. and Person B living there won't make these cost more.)
* Half the bills, no rent. (Split the running costs.)
* Half the bills, plus some rent.
* Something else (what?).

I'm not saying whether I'm Person A or Person B and I've tried not to express my opinion here, so as to get honest answers. Will therefore not take offence if you disagree with me (since you don't know what I think!).

Thanks,
Mark

[Cableguy]

Myself , im an all down the middle route and if she had moved in whilst i was still paying the mortgage i would have asked for half towards the payments on that including all the bills.

As it stands with the above i would go 50/50 on all of the running costs and any future extensions or plans for the house.

Its weird ground that the mortgage is paid as technically person b should give person a half what the purchase price was worth.

I havent got a problem giving my other half anything of what i own , but unless we paid half on everything we would argue more so its easier that way imo.

[shen]

it is reasonable for Person B to pay nothing.....

if person A and person B have a fallout after less than a year of living there then person B can cause extreme difficulty for person A, or so i'm led to believe.

If they're not worried about any fallouts then 50/50 is the right way to go as far as I'm concerned.

[marksmith]

Thanks for the replies so far. I should point out that (at this stage) we're not considering getting married and officially co-owning everything. Simply living together. (Not sure precisely what the difference is, apart from that we'll go to hell, mind.)

[Cableguy]

In that case ask for half of the bills on the agreement that if you fall out she gets none of the house and its all yours. That way your not getting any rent/mortage money but the house is yours.

Im assuming your person A for the sake of it

[Scott]

I think person B to pay half of all bills incurred in living in the house (apart from structural / extension / refurbishment type stuff).

Why? They would have to pay that wherever they lived, and if they didnt have to pay it, itd just be a free house and might turn into a drug addict (lol, extreme case), or might splash out on needless things, and slowly milk you (again, extreme case)

Since person B will already be paying half bills (or all of bills) in their old place, they will be saving more moneys by moving into person A's house (now with no rent to pay), so that offsets any quibble they may have. They can then save big time and enjoy there practically free living, and if ownership is an issue for them, they will soon (few years) be in a better position having saved.

[shen]

in short you don't want your bird saying...sorry, i mean... person A doesn't want person B falling out and leaving them taking half the house they haven't paid a bean for claiming that they're a common law wife.

[Scott]

in short you don't want your bird saying...sorry, i mean... person A doesn't want person B falling out and leaving them taking half the house they haven't paid a bean for claiming that they're a common law wife.

common law wife? is there such a thing?

[Cableguy]

in short you don't want your bird saying...sorry, i mean... person A doesn't want person B falling out and leaving them taking half the house they haven't paid a bean for claiming that they're a common law wife.

common law wife? is there such a thing?

Yeah and its very real, after someone lives with you for so long they can rape half the house

[shen]

here...

http://www.lawontheweb.co.uk/basics/cohabit.htm

although if one of the people living together decides to start lying...as is very very often the case...then you're up the creek.

It does say that in the law there is no such thing as common law wife...this is true in one respect but I know personally of cases where the so called non existent common law wife laws have raped a house owner.

example from another legal advice site...

Even if the property is in one of the party's sole name, and even if there is not a cohabitation agreement in place, the other party may have acquired a financial interest in the property recognised by law.

[daz500]

Get person B to pay half the bills or take responsibility for a fair share of them such as paying the TV license, phone bill etc.

Asking for payment for repairs might be tricky since you have no long terms plans other than using her for her body. If she does volunteer when things go wrong then you know you have a good 'un. If not, kick her out before she has any claim to your house as she's obviously a greedy bint

Would you not consider asking her to buy her own flat/house somewhere else which can be rented out? That way you both have properties which will hopefully rise in value that you both can share in. if she sponges of you then she's going to be a bit of a financial drain.

[marksmith]

Yeah and its very real, after someone lives with you for so long they can rape half the house

I can't find anything suggesting it has any legal meaning in the UK...

http://www.relationshipexpert.co.uk/the ... riage.html for example, states that it does not.

[Cableguy]

Yeah and its very real, after someone lives with you for so long they can rape half the house

I can't find anything suggesting it has any legal meaning in the UK...

http://www.relationshipexpert.co.uk/the ... riage.html for example, states that it does not.

I was refering to it in the sense that someone can claim half your house rather than the actual term of a common law wife. which trust me is very real

[C2K]

Pay half the bills but no rent, sign an agreement that if things go up the shitter in 2 minutes or 10 years there is no retribution to the house owner from the other party.

[shen]

Pay half the bills but no rent, sign an agreement that if things go up the shitter in 2 minutes or 10 years there is no retribution to the house owner from the other party.

best plan...as cable says it is indeed very real whether it is named as common law wife in uk law or not...as stated above

Even if the property is in one of the party's sole name, and even if there is not a cohabitation agreement in place, the other party may have acquired a financial interest in the property recognised by law

the recognised by law part should ring the bells here.

[Cableguy]

Bank statements showing payments towards bills or mortgages for a decent amount of time would be all it takes.

[Scott]

the other party though surely has to prove their financial interest though?

paying gas and electricity bills only shows there interest in cooking and using the TV (id have thought).

Otherwise i might have to try and get some cash out my dad for the time i was paying half of everything, and have nothing to show for it ho-hum...

[shen]

the other party though surely has to prove their financial interest though?

paying gas and electricity bills only shows there interest in cooking and using the TV (id have thought).

Otherwise i might have to try and get some cash out my dad for the time i was paying half of everything, and have nothing to show for it ho-hum...

hehe i like the cooking and tv line

when your old man passes...hopefully not for a long time....you may have brothers and or sisters who will claim their financial interest in the house.
It's at this stage that families sometimes show just how much they love one another...you at that point will need to prove your payment for half of everything.

This happened with my scumbucket cousins only a few years ago....lies galore and people threatening all sorts.
The house was worth about 3/4 of a mil and eventually went to the biggest liar as the first wife's children had no record they'd ever paid toward anything which one of them had for years after my uncle left them in the crap and went off with his second wife......in the end it went to my uncles second wife who had no claim to it whatsoever and had never lived there.


The stuff really is complicated and messy.

[Sheaf]

As said, pay for the bills etc.

However, 2 points -

1. It may be worth considering that phone/tax/water etc aren't the only bills. There's also upkeep, which IMO is right to charge/pay for by another person. An extra person does cause more wear and tear on everything.... be it carpets, paintwork, whatever. Any 'improvements' should obviously not be charged for as that's a capital investment, however wear and tear is everyone's responsibility really. Although I guess that's a point which is debatable.

2. Is 50/50 always fair? I live with my girlfriend, we do have a mortgage, bills, blah blah. However, it's not split 50/50... I earn about 55% more than her, so if we split everything down the middle she'd end up skint and I'd end up with loads of money spare at the end of the month.
We split everything according to how much we earn.... I bring 65% (ish) of the money into the household... so I pay 65% of everything house related... which isn't set in stone either mind, as it's a relationship not a business partnership. With bills only it's not so much of an issue, but may be worth considering.

[brad]

might sound silly but get some propper legal advice ect speak to a lawer sign an agreement as person a would not wnat poerson b to have some of the house if things go beers up,

so i would say get them to pay the bills that dont contribute to the running cost fo the house if that makes any sence

such as

tv licenec
cable/sky
ect

[daz500]

which isn't set in stone either mind, as it's a relationship not a business partnership.

Wait till you have set up home a few times and then your attitude will change....Oh to be young again

You are right though .. it's about sharing and not splitting everything 50/50. It's the thought that matters and if early signs are that you've got lumbered with a selfish money grabbing 2bit whore then it's time to start looking elsewhere.

If you are genuinely worried about any future claim on the house/flat then you should be able to transfer ownership of that elsewhere

[marksmith]

Thanks for the replies all.

As guessed, I am Person A. Good point about her gaining a financial interest in the house - I will indeed seek legal advice on that. I hadn't thought about that aspect.

My thoughts were that her saving about £700/month (her current rent + half bills) is a big incentive to move in, and it's difficult to be sure that's not clouding her judgement. Would she still move in with me if it were not quite so financially beneficial? And is it fair anyway for her to live rent-free? OK we're in a relationship, but I also paid my parents rent when I was living at home and earning money.

But now you all point it out, her getting half the house if it all goes pear-shaped is also a big concern.

Thanks all!

-M.

[C2K]

She would have to prove contribution to the house, which if you have accepted no rent then it's not arguable she's assisted.

Best thing is a contract you both sign, as it alleviates your mind she's not in it for the house, and she knows you're not worried about it.